Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we are here we might as well dance
No
sorry mate. I cant marry you. My Mum would go crazy if I brought a matelot home.
Just a few silly naval cartoons I have to dispose of to clear out MY PICTURES trivia.
In a moment I am going to ask you about the ORDER "on your knee" or "on your knees" and I bet you a bob or more that you cannot answer the question. More of that in a minute. Oh by the way, being a CGI might help but I doubt it !
This is an eye sight
test to qualify for
a Leading Patrolman changing
branches from a dabtoe.
So
big boy, what
have you got in
there...RABBITS ?
No RPO,
PIGS,
I don't like rabbit
meat. PIGS you
say, what, from
our wardroom ?
No way, says Jack, from the Jossman's cabin !
A Pussers CGI.
Built like a brick toilet and talks a load of verbal diarrhoea.
All mouth and no brain.
No wonder Whale Island became defunct..
Cash Office Chief Writer. Doing a runner with the ships
company pay.
Before the days of the Fleet Chief in 1970. The departmental run ashore.
The Chief, the PO, the killick, the AB, the OD and the village idiot, the junior.
The crew gets smaller every time we ditch gash.
The communal party is so bloody lethargic that to these
vultures they appear as dead meat.
Handsome with it. Jack, the very picture of good health !!!!
Can you remember those journeys between
messdeck and galley / rum issue areas ? I left the issue area
with 2 and 1, but by the time I get below to my mess, this
grog will be 10 and 1 with seawater goffers.
Is it a pussers issued No 1's or a Bernard Tailors
tiddly suit at a leg lifting, life times allotment. Jack 'mi
ticker's run ashore rig with 22" bell bottom stretched over
the chief stokers dhoby bucket ?
God almighty Smith
your PULHHEEMS reveals that you are full of soot.
You have failed your medical and I decree that from now on
your blue liners are stopped.
AMEN to all that !!
Look mate, after OFF CAPS and the WARRANT is read
comes the convict [DQ's] photograph. Shut up and just
SMILE.
No Chief, I am not out of the dress of the day.
Don't argue, you are dressed back to front.
No Chief, I am just a messy eater !
Jimmy [No 1] thinking.....just one more ring
and
then I too will be an admiral !
Now a quick prayer.
This is called the Navy's Departure which should be read at all your
forthcoming funerals.
Adrift on time's returnless tide,
As waves that follow waves we glide
God grant we leave upon this shore
Some piece of good it lacked before
Some seed or flower or plant of worth
Some added beauty to this earth
Some loving shape, something to make
The sad world happier for your sake.
God bless you and keep you.
Now an ode to Last Night.
Last night I held a little hand
So dainty and so sweet
I thought my heart would surely break
So loudly it did beat
No other hand in all the world
Could all the pleasure bring
Than that sweet hand I held last night
Four Aces and a King
And what about a sailors lament ?
My breakfast lies over the ocean
My dinner lies over the sea
My tummie's in such commotion
Please don't mention supper to me
Do you remember the
Pussers bedspread ?
Hands to bathe is usually over the side into
the 'oggin' !
Rescued from the barrel, resuscitated and
recuperating.
Now back to that Royal Naval expression - "on your knee" or expanded "on your knees". Ever heard of it ? No, nor had I until I came across this story about Portsmouth RNB which led to courts martial and some heavy punishments for certain ratings. In much earlier times [late 19th and early 20th centuries] it was the norm for newspapers to follow courts martial as they happened and to report upon them for public domain use at the end of each day or session or case. This story comes from the TIMES NEWSPAPER dated September 1906 when HMTE Shotley [which became RNTE Shotley and later HMS Ganges] was in its embryonic stages, when punishments were harsh [and didn't necessarily fit the crime !] and any slackness in discipline was quickly stamped on. Have a look at THE DISTURBANCE AT PORTSMOUTH NAVAL BARRACKS IN 1905